Moving abroad with your children: how to help them manage the change
Moving abroad for work is a challenge full of difficulties for everyone, but often those who suffer most from this choice are those who don’t really have a chance to make a decision, namely our children.
If you have teenage or preteen children, you are most likely wondering right now how to make the detachment from friends, school, customs and culture in your country less traumatic. Unfortunately, there is no universal recipe, but you can follow some of the tips below to try to better manage this change and help them integrate into their new environment.
Talk to them
Why did you make this decision? What will it entail for the whole family? How will it improve your life?
A teenager wants to be treated as an adult, and in the case of such drastic decisions, it is only right to do so! Putting your children in front of a fait accompli might be a very difficult mistake to forgive, but making them part of the choice and establishing a path with them can only strengthen your relationship.
Prepare in advance
Explore your destination country well in advance of your move. If you cannot plan a trip with them, study the language, customs, festivals, history and geography of the place with your children. Involve them in relocation planning and practical decisions such as choosing the house and school they will attend, show them photographs, videos and maps. This will help them feel part of the decision and manage anxiety and fear of the leap into the void.
Maintain emotional ties
Changing countries does not necessarily mean losing everything you have built up to that point. Encourage your children to maintain relationships with their friends and loved ones left behind in your home country. With technology, it’s easier! Invite their close friends to spend vacation time with you; always have a guest room ready. At the same time, encourage them to build new relationships at school and in the places they frequent, enroll them in classes and activities, don’t be intrusive but never let your support be lacking.
Respect their time
Each individual takes a different amount of time to adapt to new situations, often even to their own idea. Age, personality, expectations and past experiences are absolutely subjective criteria that make a difference in managing change, both practically and emotionally.
As a parent, try to be an understanding support and not a source of criticism. Avoid forcing your children to make friends or experiences, listen to them patiently and carefully, offer your guidance and understanding, while still giving them the proper space and necessary autonomy.
Seek appropriate professional help if necessary
Moving is one of the most traumatic events in an adult’s life, let alone what a drama it can be for a teenager!
Psychological, mood and behavioral problems and disorders are absolutely within the normal range of reactions your child might have. Social isolation, anxiety, stress, depression, aggression and eating disorders are in a sense physiological responses, but they should be treated properly by a specialist.
There are specialized professionals who help expats in this regard as well, and La Relocation is one of them! Turn to us for all kinds of problems, advice, help. We are here to ensure a peaceful relocation for you and your entire family!
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